Pizza! Pizza! *gunshot*
July 23rd, 2012

Pizza! Pizza! *gunshot*

Few things make you feel less like a human being than eating an entire pizza, alone, not even using a goddamn table, just you with the pizza on your lap on your couch like a monster.

This happened to me last night. How do I feel now? The dawn has broken and as I see my visage in the mirror I remember, vaguely, the man who consumed an entire Little Caesar’s pizza in the dark of a stormy Sunday evening. That man is gone now. R.I.P. Sunday night pizza eating Curt.

You died happy, buddy.

-cof

^ 21 Comments...

  1. Capital X

    Little Ceasar’s is still in existence? Were you eating the pizza while you watched a movie you rented from Blockbuster?

    [Reply]

  2. Koltreg

    I used to get one of these and eat it by myself during my DnD Friday games. Somehow I was thinner then.

    [Reply]

  3. april

    I see you’ve been under the tutelage of Eugene, and have learned the ancient art of The Sadness Pizza.

    [Reply]

  4. Santana

    I want pizza now.

    [Reply]

    chrishaley Reply:

    I still have half of one left over from lunch you can have.

    [Reply]

  5. chris

    the pie of defeat

    [Reply]

  6. josephbscott

    It looks like it was a small; all this agita over a small pizza? Don’t beat yourself up.

    [Reply]

  7. Lightning_Armour

    A triple Baconator from Wendy’s has a very similar effect, I’ve found.

    [Reply]

  8. Algeya

    An entire pizza?
    You are my idol

    [Reply]

  9. M'tt

    I’ve always wondered how chains like Little Caesar’s, Hungry Howie’s and Domino’s stay in business. Inexpensive self-punishment sounds pretty legit.

    The crazy bread is still pretty okay.

    [Reply]

  10. Charlotte

    Oh, man, how did YOU know what I was doing Saturday?

    I used a plate, though. I’m not a complete monster.

    [Reply]

  11. RiggsHB

    My recent vice is their zesty cheese bread. $4 and you wake up around 4am regretting every tangy bite.

    [Reply]

  12. UncannyJay

    Dear god, have I been there FAR too many times.
    Grad school…

    [Reply]

  13. chrishaley

    Curt at least has to drive to the Little Caesars. It is literally less than 100 feet from my house.

    [Reply]

    Charlotte Reply:

    There is a Coldstone, a Qdoba, a Panera and a Subway within 100 feet of my apartment.

    I have gained so much weight since moving into my apartment.

    [Reply]

    UncannyJay Reply:

    I am literally a block away from Huey’s. It’s a wonder my gut doesn’t have its own zip code now.

    [Reply]

  14. Stu

    Aquaman’s let himself go a bit…

    [Reply]

  15. Justin Wood

    Get your fucking cameras out of my house.

    [Reply]

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