The Enthusiast
There was a young man named Chris Haley who existed in a number of realities, as we all do. A common thread among Chris Haleys is their proclivity to keep themselves in a very poor state of living, as was the case with this particular one. He lived in a flat littered with toys and books and ate enough sweet cereal to rot his teeth. So it is, this day that this Chris is headed to some dentist, who may or may not be important as far as multi-dimensional dentists go, when he hears a slight sound and looks to the sky, only to be struck right on his third-eye by a space laser. I should mention space lasers are not common in this dimension, as I’m sure you were wondering about the noteworthiness of a space laser in a story where I’ve already explained there are a boundless number of each of us separated by a veil as thin as cheesecloth but nearly impenetrable, each a tiny bit different than the next.
Back to Chris, who finds himself supine on the street as cosmic energies infiltrate and replace every cell in his body, a process that looks quite like genocide on a microscopic level what with all of the regular human cells being burst like balloons. And he sits up, still looking and thinking like a Chris usually does. But look closer. With an electron microscope. You’ll see the difference. No skin, as we know it. No organs, no tissue, no blood, no bone. This Chris is a collection of ‘dots’, as we would come to call them later, practiced at the art of deception.
We leap forward a few months, because we can do that sort of thing when we use our imaginations, and Chris is learning that he can do unusual things. Well, unusual for us at least. Not too unusual for people blasted from space by the enigmatic Vigor Trigger.
Chris is flying and firing energy beams from his hands and eyes; he’s transforming things at a subatomic level by exciting or de-exciting their atoms, and generally doing his best to discover the secrets of the deep universe in the name of service and aid to his fellow human beings. This Chris is a superhero. This Chris fights with a fervor and the literal excitement of his electrons. This Chris is The Enthusiast!
July 22nd, 2009 at 3:48 pm
Please to be makink card games?
I would pay upwards of 50 dollars to hold The Enthusiast Limited Collector’s Edition in my hand.
[Reply]
July 22nd, 2009 at 4:04 pm
Agreed. It could be like Magic, but without the magic, and the devoted player base, and the popularity. But with superheroes.
Actually, that sounds nothing like magic.
[Reply]
July 22nd, 2009 at 6:49 pm
i think i own a vigor trigger. i think it is stuffed in the back of my underwear drawer and needs new batteries.
[Reply]
July 22nd, 2009 at 7:03 pm
Ah, yes, the old MAC cards. I always thought these were cools, especially April’s.
[Reply]
July 22nd, 2009 at 7:12 pm
Anything that April has stuffed in her underwear drawer needs new batteries.
burn.
[Reply]
July 22nd, 2009 at 7:22 pm
If only you knew, Atticus.
[Reply]
July 22nd, 2009 at 8:05 pm
What does that even mean?
[Reply]
July 22nd, 2009 at 9:02 pm
chris, i was wondering the same thing but i figured since it was a burn on me i wasn’t going to press the subject.
[Reply]
July 22nd, 2009 at 9:06 pm
So even his five o’ clock shadow is made of Kirby Dots©?
And where can I get that snazzy long-sleeved shirt?
[Reply]
July 22nd, 2009 at 9:12 pm
i think it’s more of a burn on chris.
[Reply]
July 23rd, 2009 at 12:13 am
Two things.
One – There had better be a comic or two in the nigh future featuring The Enthusiast…possibly with a cameo by Deadline.
Two – I’m sorry, but now I just can’t stop thinking about April’s underwear drawer. It’s not my fault.
[Reply]
July 23rd, 2009 at 6:00 am
MartiniMan Hunter and the Enthusiast team up in “The Crave and Cold” #1 appearing monthly by MAC comics……wait what about Aprils Undies????
[Reply]
July 23rd, 2009 at 7:57 pm
Atticus – Cards will be looked into.
Joe – Those are tattoos.
Shane – Patience.
[Reply]